In more ways than one. I just sent an email telling the Singapore folks that I am withdrawing as a candidate. I was due for a third interview today. I am still too much in limbo. Going overseas again feels like running away from limbo, but I have a feeling that the limbo would still be there. Now, if I were writing about the dance and boogie-ing under a limbos stick, I would be ok with that. However, taking this feeling of ugh with me to another country just seems like a way to perpetuate the feelings. Besides, I cannot very well ship mom over with me. Or the garden. Or the chickens.
Mom may not make it until next fall anyway. No way of knowing. If I knew, I could let the garden go. Chickens would be fine without me. Saying yes to Singapore came closer and closer to feeling as if it meant saying good-bye to my mom for the last time. So. Here I am still.
On the plus side, the garden is going crazy. The potato plants are prolific. The broccoli has doubled in size since last night! If you read yesterday’s post about that whole late night theme shift on this blog, you might notice that we are right back where we were before two o’clock in the morning. Like I said…in more ways than one.
Dapple Doodlebug thinks it is time for her to sit on some eggs again. I keep throwing her…well, setting her gently outside of the coop. She does not stay out long. The baby peepers have taking to sleeping in the nesting boxes. This makes more mess than I would like. It’s a good thing they are cute…and too tiny to make a good meal. Ahem. Actually, while we have a few chickens who would make excellent eating, we have not worked our way up to that yet. The eggs are enough for the moment. Being enough for a moment is somehow worthy in itself.
I’m going to go take escort Dapple down to the freshly dug flower section so she can hunt for worms. Worms are better than being broody any day. If one happens to be a chicken that is!
I’m just someone trying to figure out how to juggle ten acres, work, a mama with stage four cancer, and a whole lot of grumpy. This blog started out as “Grumpy Gal’s Guide to Gratitude,” but since all I really keep typing about is the garden, I figured I might as well own it! So, thanks for joining me as I try and figure out how the heck to kick myself in the booty and get on with life.